A goal of making another person do what you want will never work in the long run! This may be a dynamic that has evolved over months or years, and it can take many months to replace it with better methods. I've been surprised to learn how many women have suffered the silent treatment for days, weeks, even months at a time in their marriages. Check Out These Articles. She will eventually have to change her behavior I know these tips for dealing with the silent treatment in relationships are easier said than done! Tell your boyfriend or girlfriend how much you care about them, and how important they are to you.
The silent treatment is a passive-aggressive form of communication. Show the world that you won't simply be written off, and the world will respond by listening. Equip yourself with the tools you need to deal with difficult people, or think about breaking up with your partner. The brain reacts in the a similar way, whether the behavior is physical harm or emotional neglect. Give Your Partner Space to Think Avoid trying to figure out what your silent partner or spouse is thinking. While both parties are responsible for creating healthy communication in a relationship, no one ever deserves to be ignored, and you didn't agree to this type of passive-aggressive communication. Apologize if you're truly sorry. When couples use one or more of what John Gottman refers to as the Four Horsemen to deal with anger, disappointment, or annoyance, they run the risk of alienating or turning off their partner. If you are trying to force them to change or do things your way, you're giving them a reason to withdraw. This is called "flooding," and it happens when intense feelings, thoughts, or sensations are just too much to integrate in the moment. They start over how something was said. Be prepared for this by having a plan to leave the environment if there appears to be a threat. Ask yourself whether it's just a personality difference. Share how it feels when you get the silent treatment, and how it affects your relationship. Click here for my free Blossom Tips newsletter! Give your partner space to think. Give your partner and yourself permission to calm down. Once you fully understand what meaning you assign to an event, and what goal you want to reach, you can figure out how to get it done without your partner's help. Set rules for healthy communication. You won't find a solution that works in just a few days or weeks. Conflict is not the problem most couples face. Regular stonewalling is toxic to a healthy relationship. Here are a few strategies for dealing with the silent treatment with someone you love: You don't deserve it. Not having the skills or tools to address conflict is more likely the culprit. It doesn't fix the problem!
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